What to Expect: What is my role in therapy?

Therapy is an enigma for some people. You may have never been to a therapist or maybe haven't talked with anyone about their therapy. So really, all you know, is what you see in movies or on TV shows. Which isn't all it's about (and in some cases, we are sitting there watching the same movies and shows and YELLING at the therapist projected in them for various things that most licensed, professional therapists would never do; but that's a topic for another day).

I get so many people coming into my office saying things like, 'I don't know where to start' or 'I don't know what to do.' And sometimes, I've actually accidently made people uncomfortable because I'm sitting there waiting for them to start (Sorry if that was you!). But it's really okay to be uncertain.

So, let's talk about what you do in therapy. So you've set up the appointment, you got through the first session which is usually the intake/evaluation where the therapist may ask you about a vast array of topics to gain a big picture and you've most likely created your goals for therapy in that session.

Now you talk. About what it is that is bothering you. About the goals you set. About your week - anything that stuck out. Your therapist may ask questions. They may guide you back to your goals or back to a topic if things seem to get really far from anything productive. They may ask you if what you are talking about feels productive.

But you talk, about feelings, reactions, thoughts that you wouldn't usually share with anyone else. Because all of these things matter. Why do they matter? Because they are your feelings, reactions, and thoughts. They make up who you are (but don't define you - talk to your therapist more about that one).

Your therapist is a guide to exploring all of these things more and help you figure out your mind. But they can't read your mind (I often wish I could, would make my job easier!). So share it! There is so much benefit to figuring out the true enigma - the human mind.

If you are still uncertain, ask your therapist to help you. They are your guide and while they can't tell you what will definitely make you feel better to talk about, they may ask some questions to help get you started.